The Potty Chronicles // Slow and Steady

Hot diggity dog. I think we've had a major breakthrough with Lila and potty training. The difference: She has fully embraced wearing underwear and being a big girl. She wakes up in the morning and requests underwear. She has been wearing underwear full-time (minus nap and night time) for a week and a half now. We've had a handful of accidents, but those seem to be decreasing. One of the biggest breakthroughs is Lila's willingness to sit on a big toilet rather than her potty training toilet. We couldn't really let her wear underwear out and about before since she refused to sit on anything but the potty training toilet. This week, Lila is wearing underwear to daycare, which is a big step. So far, so good.

After five and a half years of washing and folding and dealing with cloth underwear, I've packed up the diapers and the pale and all of the other accessories to give away. Just as soon as I buy some book shelves, I'll sell the changing table on Craigslist. This slow and steady means my baby girl is transitioning into a big girl. Bittersweet feelings from this mama (although, don't get me wrong, it feels very good to be finished with diapers!).

The Potty Chronicles // No More Diapers!(?)

Before you get too excited about what that means, let me throw in a caveat: No more cloth diapers. I just put my last load of cloth diapers in the washing machine. No joke. I haven't been using them very regularly for the past few months. You better believe that this mama is super excited about the end of cloth diapers in this house!

 For the past few days, Lila has been rocking the underwear, so we haven't used many diapers at all.

We have a few disposable diapers left, so we're saving those for night time. And I've been waiting to use up the leftover pull ups that we used for Benny (stored up in the closet for nearly two years now!).

I'm not celebrating just yet. Lila still has her fair share of accidents and I have to remind her nearly hourly to sit on the potty. But, we're making progress. And progress is good.

The Potty Chronicles // Regression

Oh, how I wish the title of this post was The Potty Chronicles // No More Diapers, or, at the very least, The Potty Chronicles // Progress. Alas, we are back in diapers full-time again because Lila refuses to sit on the potty. We've taken to bribing her to at least try, but that doesn't even work. I love that my children are obstinate, but in cases like potty training it's not such a great trait.

Mentally, I am over diapers. I am so over them that I rarely use cloth any more. I bought the last box of diapers thinking that it would the the last box of diapers. We are quickly coming to the end of that box. Sigh. Also, Nate and I now routinely forget to bring diapers along on outings. In our minds, Lila is potty trained. In reality, she's not even close. We've had to make several emergency stops to buy diapers because we were going to be out and about for awhile. Sometimes we just chance it and hope that she doesn't poop.

The thing is, Lila knows how to go pee and poop on the potty. Several of her friends are potty trained. We talk a lot about how they are big boys and girls because they use the potty. Benny is a big boy because he uses the potty. Mommy is a big girl, Daddy is a big boy ... you get the point. Lila is perfectly content to be a tiny girl (her words).

Peer pressure isn't working, bribing isn't working, getting stressed out isn't working. At this point, I think Lila needs to decide that she's ready. Until then, we just have to wait and hopelessly day dream that she's potty trained - even if it means dealing with diaper drama when we're out of the house and forget diapers.

Potty Training Bloopers

As the days get shorter, the temperature gets brisker and the leaves slowly fall off the trees, the Potty Chronicles continue here in north Denver. Following Lila's impressive performance during the diaper-free weekend, we've had pretty consistent success with the potty. If she doesn't have pants on, she totally rocks the potty. And if she does, well, let's just say we've had some wet spots. Because of this issue, we typically put diapers on her when we leave the house. Except when we forget. Whoops.

During the diaper-free weekend, Lila and I visited a great new consignment store near our house. Lila had peed before we left for a trip for Target and then a quick stop to the consignment store. I tried to have her pee at Target as well, but she's a bit shy when it comes to big toilets. I figured I had a little more time and stopped in the store. And then I completely forgot that she was diaper free. She went to sit down on some kids chairs situated in a corner. Pretty soon, she said, "Mommy, I need to potty." And by need to potty, she meant that the pee was already running down her leg and pooling at her feet. Without anything to clean the mess up, I alerted the staff and promptly left the store. They were very understanding. The floor was concrete after all. Point made, Lila: No excursions without diapers.

We continued with that philosophy until last weekend when we went grocery shopping armed with an extra set of clothes. Nate was convinced that we just say no more diapers and deal with the consequences. Lila didn't even make it to the grocery store without having an accident. She peed in her seat. I changed her and figured we had an hour or two before we would be in trouble again. I tried to have her pee in the store bathroom, but the big toilet was a no go.

Since Crate and Barrel is on the way home from the grocery store, we decided to go check some rugs out. We've lived in our house for four years without a rug in the living room. It was high time to bite the bullet. Nate took Lila to the bathroom to see if he could have any luck. Just as we were about to ask for some rug samples, Lila climbed into a leather chair and said, "Mommy, I need to potty." She COVERED that chair with pee. This time the staff was not as understanding and rushed to the back to grab some leather cleaner. Although I understand that we probably shouldn't allow our children to climb on nice furniture with or without diapers, I thought the scene was rather funny. The kids and I slunk out of the store while Nate finished up.

Today Lila and I were out of the house for most of the day (it was 75 degrees here!). But whenever I asked her to use the potty, she happily obliged. She is definitely successful about four or five times a day. Then I forgot that she was just in pants. She and Benny were building forts in the living room and she was jumping on the couch. Suddenly, "Mommy, I need to potty." Karma! Luckily all of the cushions were on the floor for the fort!

The Potty Chronicles Continue

Well, after four days of a semi-diaper-free experiment, the results are mixed. Lila does a great job when I remind and bribe her to go to the bathroom (she is now very adept at watching short videos on my iPhone). Leaving the house over the past four days was the biggest challenge. Most of the time, I put Lila in a diaper because it was cold this weekend and I didn't want to deal with a change of clothes at most of the locations we visited, particularly today.

Today was fairly successful. Lila peed on command and didn't have any accidents - until tonight. We enjoyed a scooter ride around the block. I had Lila go to pee before we left. But, if anyone has seen a toddler ride a scooter, you know that it's not particularly fast. Then we ran into a friend and visited for awhile. Lila stayed dry until we got home. Just as I was asking her to come inside to go pee, she sat down on the patio and went there. Oh well. And then we forgot to ask her to pee before a bike ride tonight. She peed in the trailer - no surprise.

So, the potty chronicles continue. However, I do feel like we're well on our way to a diaper-free life in the near(ish) future.

Here are my recommendations for a successful(ish) diaper-free experience - for what they're worth!

1. Stick to the plan! I can't tell you how many times I started making plans to do something throughout the days this weekend, only to remember that we needed to stay home and see this experiment through.
2. Have a dedicated partner. I ran several errands this weekend while Nate watched Lila. He did a pretty good job of watching her and making sure she sat on the potty frequently, but he forgot too. I was certainly the driver, which can be a bit exhausting.
3. Feed your potty trainer lots of salty foods and offer them lots of drinks. We don't drink much juice around here, but I bought lemonade and watered it down for Lila all weekend. She was definitely much more likely to tell me she had to go when she really had to go.
4. Bribes work. I don't like to give the kids candy on a regular basis and I don't like to plop them in front of a video. However, in this case, I was willing to do whatever it took to get Lila to sit on the potty (because sometimes she was pretty resistant). 
5. Don't be disappointed if the diaper-free weekend doesn't work on the first try. I have a hard time believing that any kid potty trains fully after one diaper-free weekend. In fact, experts say that kids need to remain pant-less at home for at least three months after the weekend before you should start using underwear. So, it's really misleading. It should be called a diaper-free quarter. I will say that this type of training does at least introduce the concept to kids who are ready. Lila will spend many periods diaper-free at home, but we'll certainly put her in diapers when she goes to daycare and when she's out and about.

If you have any advice on how to potty train a toddler, feel free to send it my way! On the other hand, if you have any questions, feel free to leave them in the comments section. I'm not a pro, but I'm well on my way (I hope!) to having two potty trained kids.

Diaper-Free, Day 1

We hit a bit of a snag on the inaugural day of Lila's first (and hopefully last) diaper-free weekend. First, we had to take Benny to school. It snowed, so we had to bundle up and couldn't ride our bikes. So, we drove, dropped Benny off and then headed to the grocery store for weekly shopping. During the first day of a diaper-free weekend, you aren't supposed to leave the house. Whoops. Then, we ran into a neighbor whose son is in Benny's class and got invited to a short play date. I couldn't pass up the opportunity to hang out at someone else's house on this dreary day. All told, we were gone from 7:45 - 11. Whoops indeed.

But, as soon as we walked through the door, I stripped Lila down below the waist. Within a half an hour, she had peed in the potty. I could also tell that she needed to work out a number two, but didn't seem very comfortable on the potty.

She went about her business for another hour or so and then said she had to go potty. Back in the bathroom we went. This time she peed and pooped on the potty! A first for sure!

So, although I haven't been following the rules, I'm feeling good about this diaper-free day! I hope there are lots more bathroom incidents just like this the rest of the weekend.

Breakthrough?

For the past few days, I have let Lila run around the house sans pants after changing her diaper. It's not a full-on diaper-free experiment. I'm conditioning her for what is to come on Friday: I will be packing up all of the diapers (save for a few that we'll need while running errands and naps) and she will be naked full-time for four days. It's the diaper-free method of potty training that I've mentioned in the past.

Here's the quick run down: If you want to train your toddler quickly, allow her to run around naked for three days. That's right, don't put anything on her bottom - because even underwear gives her the sensation that her pee and poop is absorbed somewhere. Give her lots of juice and salty snacks to encourage drinking. Then encourage her to sit on the potty frequently. 

I tried this method with Benny THREE times without much success. If it doesn't work the first time, experts recommend waiting a month or two to try again. I'm willing to try the method again with Lila because she seems ready. Today, for example, while she was naked, she asked for a diaper. I could tell she needed to go to the bathroom because she was dancing around a bit. I encouraged her to sit on the potty. When she wouldn't, I tempted her with the promise of looking at photos on my phone. Last week the motivation was having Benny read to her. She's very fickle, this potty trainer. But today, she peed in the potty twice.

Although I know that I'm jinxing myself, I think we may have a breakthrough here. 

The Potty Chronicles

Here we go again! Anyone remember my series of posts about Benny's potty training experience? Thanks to some overzealous parents, it lasted about 18 months - or about 17 months too long. Benny expressed interest in peeing on the potty at around 18 months, so we rushed out to buy him new underwear and a toddler toilet. New parent mistake. Apparently expressing interest does not equate to actually being ready to go diaper-free. Benny was stubborn. We endured countless diaper-free weekends when we let him drink gallons of juice boxes and sit in front of movies all day - all in the hopes that he would learn to pee in the potty.

Well, we did everything we were supposed to do to have an early potty trainer: cloth diapers and lots of diaper-free periods. Alas, Benny potty trained when Benny was ready to potty train - just before he turned 3. As a result, we've been much more "chill" about Lila's experience.

However, I find myself increasingly frustrated with my daughter's obstinance. She is happy to pee in the potty when it's her idea. For example, we often let her run around naked in the evening right before jams. In those moments, she toddles right into the bathroom and pees in her toilet. She's done that 5 or 6 times. No cajoling, no pleading. If we ask her to pee in the potty, she refuses. When she has to pee, she simply asks for a diaper. See??? She totally knows when she has to pee, which is the first and, from what I understand, hardest step.

Oh, and one of the only ways Lila will actually sit on the potty when it's not her idea is to have Benny read to her. He feels pretty special.

So, I suppose I'm going to have to work harder with some diaper-free weekends. Let the games begin.

Something Totally Cosmic

Coming clean about my feelings about dirty diapers opened something up - something totally cosmic. Not 24 hours after posting my disdain for diapering, Lila said she wanted to sit on the potty, sat down and got right back up. That's a pretty normal for her. She'll sit briefly and then get up, saying she wants a diaper.

Tonight, though, that's where the cosmic comes in. Tonight she got up, grabbed a book and sat back down. I figured it was all part of the routine and helped Benny get ready for bed. Not one minute later I checked on her. She got up and told me she wanted a diaper. But, you know what was different about tonight? THERE WAS PEE IN THAT POTTY! I nearly cried I was so happy.

So I did the potty dance, Benny did the potty dance and Lila looked thoroughly confused. I insisted that we call Nate to tell him about the momentous first pee. Lila told him "pee pee potty." Benny then grabbed the phone and told Nate that we all did the potty dance. Then Benny shared some of his Smarties from school with Lila to celebrate.

I don't doubt that we'll be in diapers for some (many) more months, but a mom can dream, can't she?

Potty Talk Revisited

Apparently the secret to successful potty training is to push and push and push and just about give up. Then, bam! Your kid decides to surprise you and start requesting the potty. After my cyber meltdown last week, Nate and I struggled with what our next step would be. Nate advocated for maintaining the status quo - keep Benny in big boy pants until he decided to start going in the potty. I was convinced this route result in 1) a UTI since Benny was holding it for so long and 2) urine puddles all over our house, his school, and anywhere we visited.

On Thursday I picked Benny up from school and he was wearing the SAME pants he was wearing when I dropped him off. Could this be? Did he go the whole day without wetting his pants? It's true, he did. On Friday, I decided to keep him in underpants. Why not? Before we left the house for the day, he performed the potty dance. I thought we were in for a big accident. Then he told me he needed to use the potty and went both pee AND poop. We were both elated. We attended his first play that day: Rapunzel. He asked to go potty when we first got there and asked to go again during the play. I couldn't believe it!

The rest of the weekend has been a breeze. He asks to go to the potty and we go. The pooping isn't going so smoothly, but we're on our way!

Potty Talk

I feel like I've been writing about our adventures in potty training for years on this site. We've had a love/hate relationship with potty training for what is going on 18 months.

Benny started telling me that he pooped when he was 18 months. Nate and I got a little excited about this development and bought a little potty for Benny. We talked a lot about going on the potty and even put Benny on the potty a few times in those first few months. One morning he peed on the potty, so I rushed to Target and bought Benny some big boy underwear. That must have been before Benny's 2nd birthday.

Fast forward nearly a year. Benny still isn't potty trained. Our delays have come in a variety of forms: I started working full time, Benny started daycare. We tore apart our kitchen starting in December and it remained that way for a good long time. We travelled a lot in May. Nate and I never really thought we could devote a lot of time to the potty training ordeal, especially because Benny has been very opposed to sitting on the potty.

This kid has a will of steel - and, as it turns out, a bladder that's even stronger. This winter I attempted a pants-free weekend. I read somewhere that most kids do better at potty training when they aren't wearing any pants. You just need to pump them full of liquids and remind to sit on the potty. Benny and I did a potty dance for an entire day. I gave him all sorts of things to drink and sat him on the potty every 30 minutes or so. He ended up going to the bathroom on the carpet. And then proceeded to tell everyone who visited that he peed there. The expirement lasted all of two days before I gave up. Benny would hold out going to the bathroom until 1) I put a diaper on at nap time, or 2) I put pants on when someone came to the house.

I felt as though he was sending me a pretty clear message: He was not ready to sit on the potty. So, we continued to talk about the potty and tried to bribe the little booger to sit on the potty. After a couple of days, the bribes didn't even work. We would ask if he wanted to sit on the potty. He would answer, NO! We would remind him that he would get a treat (sucker, small cookie, whatever). H would answer, I don't want a sucker/small cookie/whatever. Now the message was crystal clear: He was not ready to sit on the potty. We gave it a rest.

As Benny's third birthday approaches, however, Nate and I decided that we need to do something to encourage him to sit on the potty. So, about two months ago, Nate told Benny that when he is three, he'll have to sit on the potty. Benny, being the bright little whipper snapper that he is, reminded us that he's not three, he's two. He will sit on the potty when he's three.

As of late, we've revisited the pantless tactics. Benny has gone in the potty a few times, but mostly just holds it. And holds it. And holds it. One day he held it for SEVEN hours before I had to put a diaper on him for a nap. Then he peed to his heart's content. Last night, he was running around, doing the pee pee dance for about 30 minutes. Every time I tried to sit him on the potty he screamed and got up. Eventually, I took my eyes off of him for two seconds and he peed on the floor.

We're at a loss here. We feel like we can't go back to full-time diapering because that sends the wrong message. But, I'm still not sure that he's mentally ready for this next step. His teachers at daycare said that he's a smart kid and smart kids tend to hold out. I'm not sure whether or not that's what's going on here. At this rate, he'll be 10 before he goes pee in the potty! And we haven't even started addressing the poop factor!

Pee Pee in the Potty!

Big news: Benny went pee in the toilet last night. And, unlike the other times he's gone to the bathroom on the big boy chair, he seemed to understand what was going on last night and was excited to be doing it. I'm not sure if we've turned a corner or not, but this is definitely progress. Baby steps. We'll keep taking them until we're diaper-free!

On another positive pee-related note: We're using cloth diapers at night now rather than disposable. That way we can make up for some of the waste of using disposable diapers at daycare. Hurrah for green parenting!